Is it normal to not want sex?

Libido, a person's overall interest in sex, is not a fixed amount that everyone should have. Some people want sex often, some rarely, and many find their interest rises and falls over the years. There is no correct frequency.

Some people experience little or no sexual attraction at all and identify as asexual. For them, not wanting sex is part of who they are, not a symptom to fix.

Desire is closely linked to how life is going. Stress, tiredness, anxiety and depression, relationship problems, pregnancy and new parenthood, menopause, long-term illness and some medicines, including certain antidepressants and hormonal contraception, can all lower it.

For many people, desire is responsive rather than spontaneous: it appears once closeness or touch begins, instead of arriving out of the blue. Not feeling sudden urges does not mean desire is absent.

If a change in your sex drive worries you, if it started with a new medicine, or if a difference in desire is causing strain with a partner, a GP or other clinician can look for physical causes. A persistent lack of interest that causes distress is sometimes diagnosed as hypoactive sexual desire.

Sex therapists and couples counsellors help people with desire differences all the time. And if you are content with little or no sex, you do not need to change anything.