Fleabagging - meaning and definition
Definition
Repeatedly dating people who are wrong for you, despite knowing the pattern.
At a glance
- Means repeatedly choosing partners who are a bad fit.
- Named after the TV series "Fleabag".
- Often involves ignoring the same red flags each time.
- Patterns can be linked to attachment and self-esteem.
In detail
The term borrows the name of the British TV series "Fleabag", whose main character keeps making messy romantic choices. Someone who is fleabagging might keep falling for emotionally unavailable people or ignore the same red flags each time.
Recognising a pattern is a useful step. Attachment history, self-esteem and what feels familiar can all shape who we are drawn to, and a therapist or honest friends can help someone notice and change the cycle.
In a sentence
- Another unavailable artist? I am fleabagging again.
- My friends staged an intervention to stop my fleabagging.
Where the word comes from
Named after "Fleabag" (2016 to 2019), the British comedy-drama by Phoebe Waller-Bridge. The dating term spread around 2019.
Common questions
Why do people keep dating the wrong type?
What feels exciting or familiar is not always what is good for us. Early attachment experiences, low self-esteem and intermittent reinforcement can all play a part. Reflecting on the pattern, alone or with a therapist, can help.