Infidelity - meaning and definition
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Definition
Breaking the agreed boundaries of a relationship, typically by having a secret sexual or romantic connection with someone else.
At a glance
- Breaking the agreed boundaries of a relationship, usually in secret.
- What counts depends on each relationship's agreements.
- In open relationships it can mean breaking specific rules, such as non-disclosure.
- It is often felt as a deep betrayal, with effects that can resemble trauma.
- Some couples separate afterwards, others rebuild, sometimes with therapy.
In detail
What counts as infidelity depends on the agreements within a relationship. For a monogamous couple it may include any outside romance or sexual contact; in an open relationship it may mean breaking specific rules, such as not disclosing a new partner.
Infidelity is often experienced as a profound betrayal of trust, and its impact can resemble trauma. Some couples separate afterwards, while others rebuild with honest conversation and sometimes couples therapy.
In a sentence
- Infidelity isn't just about who you sleep with, it's about breaking what you agreed.
- After the infidelity came out, we started seeing a couples counsellor.
Where the word comes from
From the Latin infidelitas, meaning unfaithfulness or lack of faith.
Not to be confused with
- Ethical non-monogamy
In ethical non-monogamy, outside relationships are known and agreed, so they are not infidelity.
Common questions
Can a relationship survive infidelity?
Many do. Rebuilding usually takes honesty, time and real effort from both partners, and some couples find couples therapy helpful. Others decide to separate, which can also be a healthy choice.
Can people in open relationships be unfaithful?
Yes. Infidelity means breaking the agreements of a relationship, so in an open relationship it might mean hiding a partner or ignoring agreed rules.