Gaslighting - meaning and definition
Alsogaslightgaslitgas lighting
Definition
Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation in which someone repeatedly causes another person to doubt their own memory, perception or judgement.
At a glance
- Gaslighting is manipulation that makes someone repeatedly doubt their own memory, perception or judgement.
- It can include denying events, rewriting what happened or calling someone too sensitive to be believed.
- Over time it can erode confidence and increase dependence on the person doing it.
- It refers to a sustained pattern, not an ordinary disagreement about what happened.
In detail
The term comes from the 1938 play Gas Light and its film adaptations, in which a husband secretly dims the lights and then insists his wife is imagining it. In abusive relationships, gaslighting can include denying things that clearly happened, rewriting events, or suggesting the other person is too sensitive or unstable to be believed. Over time it can erode confidence and increase dependence on the abuser.
Sociologist Paige Sweet has argued that gaslighting often draws on wider social stereotypes, for example about women being irrational. In everyday speech the word is now used very broadly, sometimes for any disagreement about what happened. Honest differences in memory are common; gaslighting refers to a sustained pattern that undermines someone's sense of reality, often alongside other controlling behaviour.
In a sentence
- He kept insisting I'd agreed to plans I'd never heard of, and my friend said that sounded like gaslighting.
- Not every argument about who said what is gaslighting; sometimes people just remember things differently.
Where the word comes from
The term comes from Patrick Hamilton's 1938 play Gas Light and its film adaptations, especially the 1944 film. It was used in psychology from the 1960s onward and became very common in everyday speech in the 2010s and 2020s.
Not to be confused with
- A disagreement
Two people remembering an event differently is normal; gaslighting is a repeated pattern of making someone distrust their own perception.
Common questions
What are signs of gaslighting?
Signs can include frequently doubting your own memory, being told you are imagining things or overreacting, apologising constantly, and feeling confused or less confident around one person. It often occurs alongside other controlling behaviour. Domestic abuse helplines can offer confidential support.
Is every disagreement about the past gaslighting?
No. People genuinely remember events differently. Gaslighting describes a sustained pattern that undermines someone's sense of reality, often to gain or keep control.
Related terms
Sources
- American Sociological ReviewSweet (2019) The sociology of gaslighting