Kink & BDSM 18+
Factual definitions of kink and BDSM vocabulary, with a focus on consent, negotiation and safety. Written for adults, without explicit description.
18+ For adults
Kink & BDSM is written for adults. Entries are factual and non-explicit, with a focus on consent and safety.
46 entries
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- AftercareThe care partners give each other after kink play, or any intense intimacy, to help everyone come back to a settled physical and emotional state.
- BDSMAn overlapping acronym for bondage and discipline, dominance and submission, and sadism and masochism: consensual practices built around restraint, power exchange or intense sensation.
- BondageConsensual physical restraint of a partner, using materials such as rope, cuffs or fabric, as part of kink play.
- BratA playful submissive style in which someone teases, resists or 'misbehaves' on purpose as part of a consensual game with a partner.
- CollaringA commitment ritual in some D/s relationships, where a collar or other symbol marks a submissive's agreed relationship with a dominant.
- Consensual non-consentA negotiated role-play in which partners agree in advance to act out a scenario that appears non-consensual, while real consent, limits and a way to stop remain in place.
- Dominance and submissionThe part of BDSM centred on a consensual dynamic in which one partner leads or controls and the other follows or yields.
- DominantIn kink, the person who takes the leading or controlling role in a consensual power exchange.
- Don't yuck my yumA community saying asking people not to express disgust at other people's consensual preferences, even ones they do not share.
- Dungeon monitorA volunteer or staff member at a kink event who watches for safety problems and consent violations and can step in or stop a scene.
- Edge playKink activities that carry a higher risk of serious physical or psychological harm, or that push close to a participant's limits.
- FemdomFemale dominance: kink dynamics in which a woman takes the dominant role, sometimes extended into a 'female-led relationship'.
- FetishA strong sexual interest focused on a particular object, material, body part or situation that is not usually thought of as sexual in itself.
- Hard limitsActivities or themes that a person will not take part in under any circumstances; they are not open to persuasion during or before a scene.
- Impact playConsensual kink activities that involve striking a partner, by hand or with an implement, for the sensation or the power dynamic.
- KinkAn umbrella word for consensual sexual or relational interests and practices that fall outside what a given culture treats as conventional.
- Kink-aware professionalA therapist, doctor or other professional who understands consensual kink and will not treat it as a problem in itself.
- Kink-shamingMocking, belittling or judging someone for consensual sexual interests or practices.
- Leather communityA subculture, historically rooted in gay men's communities after the Second World War, that combines kink, leather clothing, mentorship and strong traditions of mutual support.
- MunchA casual, non-sexual social meet-up for people interested in kink, typically held in a restaurant, café or pub.
- NegotiationThe conversation before kink play in which partners agree what they want, what is off-limits, how to stop and what care they will need afterwards.
- Play partyAn organised private event where adults may engage in kink activities, usually under published rules about consent, conduct and safety.
- Power exchangeA consensual arrangement in which one person agrees to take control and another agrees to give it up, for a scene or as part of an ongoing relationship.
- PRICK (personal responsibility, informed consensual kink)A kink ethics framework that adds personal responsibility to informed consent: each participant owns their choices, research and communication.
- ProtocolAgreed rules, rituals or forms of behaviour that express a power-exchange dynamic, such as particular forms of address or ways of greeting.
- RACK (risk-aware consensual kink)A kink ethics framework holding that participants should understand and accept the specific risks of what they do, rather than assume any activity is fully safe.
- Role-playPartners consensually adopting characters or scenarios, for example stranger, teacher or captive, as part of intimate or kink play.
- Rope bondageBondage using rope, including the Japanese-influenced styles known as shibari or kinbaku, often valued for its aesthetics as much as for restraint.
- SadomasochismThe consensual giving (sadism) or receiving (masochism) of intense sensation or controlled discomfort for pleasure or emotional release.
- Safety shearsBlunt-tipped medical scissors kept within reach during bondage so that restraints can be cut quickly and safely in an emergency.
- SafewordA pre-agreed word or signal that immediately pauses or stops a scene, chosen so it cannot be confused with in-character protest.
- SceneA single, bounded period of kink play with a beginning and an end; 'the scene' can also mean the kink community as a whole.
- Sensation playKink play that focuses on creating particular physical sensations, such as contrasts of temperature or texture, or on removing senses with blindfolds.
- Service submissionA submissive orientation focused on the satisfaction of being useful or looking after a partner, for example through tasks, errands or rituals of care.
- Soft limitsActivities someone is hesitant about or would only try under specific conditions, as opposed to a firm refusal.
- SSC (safe, sane and consensual)An early BDSM community motto stating that kink should be safe, undertaken in a sound state of mind, and consensual.
- SubdropA low mood, tiredness or emotional crash that a submissive or bottom may feel hours or days after intense play.
- SubmissiveIn kink, the person who consensually yields control to a partner in a power exchange, within agreed limits.
- SubspaceAn altered, often floaty or trance-like state of mind some submissives or bottoms experience during intense play.
- SwitchSomeone who enjoys both dominant and submissive roles, or both top and bottom roles, depending on partner, mood or situation.
- Top and bottomIn kink, the 'top' carries out an activity and the 'bottom' receives it; the terms describe roles in a scene rather than who holds power.
- TopdropA low mood, doubt or exhaustion that a top or dominant may feel after play, similar to subdrop.
- Total power exchangeA form of power exchange intended to apply to most or all areas of a relationship, all the time, rather than only during scenes.
- Traffic light systemA common safeword convention: 'green' means all good, 'yellow' means slow down or check in, and 'red' means stop now.
- VanillaSlang for sexual preferences or relationships that do not involve kink; used neutrally, not as an insult.
- Yes/no/maybe listA checklist of activities that each partner marks as yes, no or maybe, used to start conversations about interests and limits.